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torn
I don’t think it is any great surprise that we go through this world torn between ‘wants’ and ‘shoulds’.
Like a bratty child, the id wants things as it wants it and right now, damn it. Mine wants fries and it does not care to hear this nonsense about carbohydrates or fat intake; it wants chocolat and it will cover it’s ears and yell ‘nya-nya, I can’t hear you!’ when it is spoken to about caffeine’s effects on your complexion; mine wants to sleep late every single day and will likely kick you in the head if you start waxing on about work and responsibilities again.
The superego is supposed to keep this all in line. Like an adult wagging their finger and telling you what a bad girl you were, we come pre-wired with guilt, and the Jews among us come bundled with an extra dose. Post-French fry-gasm mine questions ‘Was it really that good? Was it worth it?’ Post-chocolate haze it chides ‘Look. It’s all gone and you are still unsatisfied.’ And when I wake up at noon it needles me ‘Half your day is gone and you’re going to be stressed and rushed and unable to sleep tonight.’
I think that dating is not all that different. My id wants pretty! and tall! and likes to go to bars with me! While my superego knows that I should look for a boy with a good relationship with his mother, a healthy lifestyle, no history of cheating, and doesn’t drink too much. Yawn, right?
And so, when my boyfriend makes sure my drunken ass gets in a cab and up the stairs okay, I should think ‘what a great guy!’ but really what crosses my mind is ‘I could do this more often!’ When he cleans up after himself I should be pleased but really I am ecstatic that he’s picked up my socks, too. When he gets take-out on the way home for us, I should think ‘how well he takes care of me’ but really I think ‘so I can just sit here and have food brought to me? Word.’ I should be happy that my boyfriend takes an interest in my clothing but I’m really just excited he didn’t make fun of me when I fell in love with these $18.99 shoes from Target. And lastly, when he gives me multiples I should think ‘what a dutiful lover’ but really I just think ‘Can I have another?’
But, really - I don't feel badly about that one at all.
comments (16)
all i want is to see the shoes! why oh why can't i see the shoes? this may warrant a description, so i may shop vicariously...
1 | lauren | March 26, 2004 12:56 PM
Hm, I'm not having any trouble - is anyone else having difficulties pulling up the images I'm trying to add to posts?
2 | deb | March 26, 2004 01:14 PM
Nope, no problems at all. I've seen all the shoes to date and then some!
3 | midlife | March 26, 2004 01:50 PM
I can only see one shiny open-toed toe. tease.
4 | erin | March 26, 2004 02:35 PM
no problems here either, except with mossimo. i thought they went out with o.p. :)
have a great weekend deb.
5 | hubs | March 26, 2004 02:44 PM
heh. Nor should you - feel bad that is.
6 | Dan | March 26, 2004 02:47 PM
hours later and i got them. tres cute. worth coming back for a look.
7 | lauren | March 26, 2004 05:26 PM
No pictures for me either. I have OS X and I am using IE.
8 | Monica | March 26, 2004 06:03 PM
Once people have to start troubleshooting operating systems and browsers on a blog, that's where hollismb steps in. There was something wicked wrong with the original .jpg image, which wouldn't even allow it to be edited in Fireworks, not to mention how incredibly large the size of the file was, which was almost a meg. Anyway, reworked, here's another look for all the non-shoe-seeing folks.
9 | hollismb | March 26, 2004 06:42 PM
Is there really a difference between "how well he takes care of me" and "so I can just sit here and have food brought to me? Word."?
I think not.
10 | Frankenstein | March 26, 2004 11:13 PM
Clearly I'm no expert at this image thing - I was so proud of myself for getting an image up at all. (Frankenstein can attest to my utter uselessness where code is concerned.) Thanks hollismb. I believe we've all stolen at least $100 of company time looking at a pair of $19 shoes!
Anyway, I think there's a subtle difference between 'taking care' and 'having food brought' where the latter is distinctly more bratty and self-serving, don't you think?
11 | deb | March 27, 2004 08:40 AM
Does Alex have a brother?
12 | Mala | March 27, 2004 01:17 PM
Those were only $19? I want a pair.
13 | Belle | March 28, 2004 03:47 PM
If chocolate leaves you unsatisfied, then it must be of substandard quality.
14 | Lux | March 28, 2004 04:53 PM
Alex only has a sister, a disappointment to most of my female friends, some of my gay male friends, and me, for I would probably steal him for my own sister. Heh.
Belle, you most certainly need to go get them. They've actually arrived, but in my laziness, I've yet to pick them up from my apartment. They're so cute, I'm sure they're going to break my feet in half. Fun!
La Maison Du Chocolat chamapagne truffles (pictured)at $2.50 apiece are nothing short of orgasmic. You actually only need one. Sadly, they are not usually around, hence the dissatisfaction. Wah.
15 | deb | March 28, 2004 06:37 PM
I'm a true lover of the Godiva White Chocolate Heart, you have to go to a Godiva store to get them (so similar to the ice cream)and yet you only need one of those also... That can satisfy my whole lunch! As for shoes, I never really feel an affinity towards shoes, plain janes... Not very satisfying for an earthy girl like myself. But, if I were those shoes might not do it for me, a little too wild, or maybe I'm a little too subdued. Not the NYC girl required to wear those shoes, but than I live in the burbs, and I mean truely the burbs... And as for Alex, Deb he probably wouldn't be as satifying if you weren't his better half he would be missing something, or always looking for something... SAD felling believe me.