A rough outline: I. Blah blah wedding blah. II. Blah blah wedding blah. III. Blah blah wedding blah. IV. Blah blah wedding blah cupcakes!
The problem I am having with all of this wedding planning that has descended upon my already anxiety-ridden existence is the problem I have with, well frankly, everything: prioritizing. I’m a fusspot by nature; I agonize over details and consider it a good time. I weave lattice-top pies, I like my onions diced into perfect tiny cubes, I scrub between the faucets with an old toothbrush (or Alex’s, you know, if he’s been acting out lately). And yet, despite my fusspot nature, I think the obsession over weddings in our culture by girls with obviously nothing else to do, is ridiculous. Self-absorbed. Insecure. But I want to have a *wedding*. Not too big, not too gauche, but I want it. The flower girl. The ketubah and the broken glass. The boys in matching tuxedos. At least one flower in my hair. The honeymoon in warm and far-away place. And it’s going to be soon, like this-summer-soon. Thus, the pressure is on.
I could explain to you that Alex’s sister is in law school in another state and it’s really inconvenient/impossible for her to take a week off any time but during the summer. I could explain that I find the Sunday twilight thing preferable in the summer, and also by the water. I could give you a million reasons why the date is so much sooner than any wedding planner or bridezilla would recommend, but it’s really not the point. The wedding will be this summer because it’s clear to me, after just three weeks of planning that I don’t want more than another eight months of this.
Which brings us back to the details. It is possible, more than possible, to plan a wedding in under a year (yes, I know, theknot.com would be horrified) but it forces you to give up some teensy control of the minutiae. It lends itself towards catering halls that include most of the things you need for one price. It will probably be easier for me to use their in-house florist (but set my foot down at carnations, of course). It rules out a certain amount of agonizing over details. It also means I probably can’t use this location that Krissa (thank you!) brought to my attention, a place so gorgeous, so me, that I almost demanded that we postpone so we could set it up there. But then, I imagined the process that will spill out over the next seventeen months: finding a caterer, renting everything from tables to linens to forks, alerting my parents and his that they need to shave a chunk of people off each of their guest lists, details, detail, and details. And while it would satisfy my inner Martha Stewart, matching linens to lilies, menu to décor, music to ambience – I can’t say it sounds like the most enjoyable way to spend most of my free time for the next year.
And so, for once, I’m trying to bind and gag my inner fusspot; attempting to leave the tiny bits to others so I can focus on what really counts: him, me, our nearest and dearest, and a sumptuously tiered cupcake wedding cake from Billy’s Bakery.
You know, just the essentials.
OMG I LOVE the cupcake idea! It's sooo cute! And so you! Well, you know - the you I, as a random person from another country who has been reading your blog for a year or so, know...
People LOOK at the place that GoogleAds links this entry to! Talk about MY STYLE! It's even on Lake Ronkonkoma! (Am I the only person who thinks of 200 Cigarettes when they hear the word Ronkonkoma? "We're not going any further than Avenue B! If you go to Avenue C, I'm going back to Ronkonkoma!" Sorry, I digress.)
We planned our wedding on a similar timeline (late Jan engagement for a wedding in early Oct, but we were out of the country for 3 months, so it was basically the same amount of "real" time) -- i found the wedding to be the focus of my life from when we started planning until it's over, so i'm all for short durations on the engagement front :) the non-wedding hall option is always a restaurant -- no rentals/caterer required and lots of restaurants don't require the amount of flowers that wedding halls do, since they tend to have more innate character... if wedding hall is more your speed, check out American Park on the Battery -- they have great food, full-service offerings and a really beautiful view of the Statue of Liberty and the NY Harbor.
I didn't have a wedding reception but a more homely party months after the fact--but we served cupcakes and it was AWESOME. That's what everyone remembers most. Cupcakes are the new...uh...cake. never mind.
i'm not sure whether to GLOW WITH HAPPINESS AND PRIDE that you loved the place just like I knew you would or to WAIL AND CRY AND GNASH that one more perfectly-suited beautiful-bride can't have her wedding at the Foundry (um, the first one was, um, me). I think i will try to glow and gnash simultaneously.
I planned my wedding in five months. We got engaged in June and married in November, due to what you mentioned above, the planning was getting crazy and I didn't want it to take over my life for 15 months.
And I had a tier-ed cupcake cake for my shower.
6 | Anonymous | January 13, 2005 10:59 AM
i went to a wedding that had one side cupcake-cake (which i think is way better than a cake bc it affords you variety - chocolate frosting or vanilla - and just looks very cute) and the other side was a pyramid of the original glazed krispy kreme donuts with little pansies as decor. you'll have a lovely wedding no matter what. as long as you and alex and your guests are having a wonderful time!
ONE SHOULD NEVER SUGGEST SUCH THINGS TO A GIRL WITH PMS. Am I the only one who thinks this looks godly?
Engaged after Thanksgiving ... married in March. Yes, it can be done! BUT, if it's gonna be a "cupcake" cake, then my vote is for Yankee Doodles all covered with white icing (Devil Dogs will suffice if the cake architecture demands.)
9 | SantaDad | January 13, 2005 11:28 AM
My best friend had a cupcake wedding cake and it was perfect. As an added bonus, she supplemented with a candy table - she ordered an assortment of colorfully wrapped penny candies and supplied goody bags for guests to load up and take home with them. It was a HUGE hit!
10 | Anonymous | January 13, 2005 12:46 PM
All good weddings are based on (if not deeply dependent on) cupcakes.
This can also to applied to crime-fighting but thats a whole other story.
Cupcakes? Doughnuts? I have so not been paying attention, but then, it's six years since my last steady relationship with a woman I'd seriously consider marrying.
There are things that are just kinda passed over in circumstances such as mine.
I sincerely hope that one of these days you'll get around to telling us what it is about you and cupcakes.
OOOooooOooOohhhhh those cupcakes look awesome!!!
That's quite an idea :) Might have to steal it. But not till 2006.
Uh, would it be gauche to suggest Tastykake Butterscotch Krimpets? Mmmmm...OH MY G-D! I can buy them online by the case? Wahoo! Oh...sorry...hehe...got carried away.
The above posters suggestion for venue is actually called Battery Gardens (one of the 20 places I looked at). The Foundry is awesome (didnt actually go there). If I had the cash, I would be doing it here:skystudios.com. And I would change into a white bikini and go swimming in the rooftop pool. Aaah.
Make it happen! Hire a wedding planner and have her round up all the shit for a Foundry Wedding. A friend of mine recommends capandgownweddings.com
I got married last October and we had a cupcake wedding cake. It was awesome and perfect. It is also easier to force feed your new spouse a cupcake than a crumbly old piece of regular cake for the photo ops.
Oooh! Love it and it perfectly suits you!! I like the idea of variety too. :-)
It's entirely possible to plan a wedding--a real, full-of-personal-details, reflects-the-bride-and-groom wedding in eight months. It's even possible to do it in a place you really want, if you're willing to be a little bit flexible (says the girl who got married in a barn! But it was a really, really cool barn that has been redone for just such an occasion!). And if you email me, I will send you a photo of our groom's cake, which was a giant, four-tiered rice krispie treat.
We did cupcakes at our wedding too -- wonderful, wonderful (and check out www.confetticakes.com for a fabulous NY bakery; I got married in Big Sur, CA but have been wowed since by Elisa's work). Instead of a tier, though, we placed them on various different levels of glass-brick platters. Plus you can have variety in favors, i.e. carrot cake with vanilla bean mascapone filling; chocolate cake with chocolate mousse filling; white cake with lemon curd filling (just off the top of my head, right?). Good luck! It can be overwhelming so just focus on the things you care about most and not what the proverbial Great-Aunt Mimi thinks you should have. Believe you me, everyone has an opinion, but only your and Alex's matter.
that is SO the way to do it--figure out what matters, do that, ignore the rest!!
I've been reading your entries since my husband found your engagement story and told me about your site.
When I saw your cupcake cake, I immediately thought of another site that I found recently (misszoot.com) who mentioned that she gets the most google hits from her Krispy Kreme wedding cake. Here is the link, if you are curious. Um, if you have trouble with the link, she mentions it in her Jan 7th (Is it something's birthday) entry.
It looks a little more low-key than the one you linked to in comment 8, but it is a good photo.
The smartest thing I accidentally did while planning my wedding? I had my husband-to-be write down the three words he wished people would use when they described our wedding and I did the same. Later, when I started getting really nuts, anything that didn't evoke one of those words I just let go of as unimportant. (Or at least I tried to!)