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costume failure
My first matrimonially-related bad dream occurred just two days after Alex and I got engaged, while we were still in Paris. Our plan was to tell our friends the big news at a holiday party the evening we returned from France. But, in my dream version of the event, each time I showed a my friends the ring, they turned and walked away, saying nothing. By the fifth time this happened, I’d was so hurt and unnerved and hurt by their responses that my friend Christa pulled me aside: “Deb, I’m sorry to have to do this, but as a friend of yours, I have to. Your ring is horrible; just hideous. This isn’t just about him; you need to pick out something that you like, too.”
“What do you mean? I love this ring!” I shrieked.
But, when I looked down, I saw that it actually was hideous. I mean, it had almost an entire chandelier looped up from the platinum base; it extended about a foot from my hand. How had I missed this? How had I not impaled myself with this in the last six days I’d fallen asleep wearing it?
As it turned out, the “chandelier” came right off, leaving behind it my actual, lovely and tasteful ring. But, I was so shook when I woke up, I had to tell Alex, who proceed to laugh his ass off: “You have to write that story down for people!”
***
So, since that was almost six months ago, why today? Well, because with but 78 days left until *that* day, it seems the wedding-related bad dreams are starting again.
First, there was the one where I had forgotten to get the Beast™ altered, it was still a foot too long, and I tripped trying to walk down the aisle. (I made a fitting appointment the next day.) Then, there was the one where I hadn’t bought shoes for the dress and ended up wearing my black flip-flops down the aisle. (I now have two pair of shoes to choose from.) But last night* was the clincher, wherein I dreamed that I was wearing one of those despicable clear plastic strapped bras with my off-the-shoulder dress. (You know, because they trick everyone.)
So, what’s the gig? Why do I only have bad dreams about costume failure? Why can’t I have pre-wedding panic attacks over normal things, like if I am marrying the right man, and what if he never learns to put his shoes away and are we always going to argue about stupid things and pretend we’re never wrong and also, what’s the deal with those goofy faces he makes when he sleeps… and the cover stealing… and, and…
OH. MY.
Perhaps these nightmares about silicone-strapped holsters aren’t so bad. Maybe tonight, I’ll be lucky enough to dream about my flask falling out of my garter! Hooray!
* Hey, you know what’s a good time? Running two window air conditioners, every light in the apartment - including closets and bathrooms - the stove, the toaster, your computer, and the television at the same time and then having a power failure that can’t be reset until morning and sleeping in a puddle of your and your honey's sweat. It's funny, because I was just about to use the hairdryer when it happened. Okay, I lied, it wasn't even a little funny or a good time.
comments (11)
Costume related dreams must be a sign from your subconscious that you have in fact chosen the right man. Sweet Dreams!
1 | Rochelle | June 10, 2005 02:19 PM
why can't it be reset til morning? don't you have access to your switches? you should, if you're paying for your electricity.
Joce--the queen of blowing fuses with her 2500 watt professional $150 hair-dryer
2 | jocelyn | June 10, 2005 02:54 PM
oh good gracious... i haven't begun to have any of those dreams yet and i'm hoping i never will.
3 | devlyn | June 10, 2005 03:13 PM
Well, it turns out the super lives almost 2-hours away. We felt really bad asking him to come out at 11 PM. So, we told him to come by this morning. For some reason, we it needs to be reset through the (locked) basement. It's really annoying.
4 | deb | June 10, 2005 03:13 PM
I have three recurring, stress induced dreams. In one, I have a paper or project due the next day that I haven't started on (this is the most frequent). In another, I'm walking somewhere and airplanes start falling out of the sky around me (that's the REALLY stressed out dream).
In the third, I'm getting ready to go somewhere really important and can't find anything to wear. And it's not a "oh these pants don't look good" situation. It's more like "I have to choose between this 80s prom dress or my band uniform from middle school." I think I have that dream when I'm worried about peoples' perceptions of me, rather than how I actually am.
5 | Colleen | June 10, 2005 04:08 PM
ok, i have to know. what is your wedding cake going to be like?
6 | sarah | June 10, 2005 05:15 PM
In my pre-wedding anxiety dream, I walked down the aisle with the entire back panel of my dress missing! Except that I didn't know it was missing until my grandmother pulled me aside (AFTER the ceremony) to tell me that, "Liz dear, your tushy was hanging out."
7 | Liz | June 10, 2005 06:01 PM
Anxiety dreams suck, at least until you wake up and that wave of relief hits you.
Although...maybe with TheBeast, you really could wear black flip-flops. Now that WOULD be cool.
8 | Robert | June 11, 2005 11:35 AM
Metaphysically it's said the we have an essence, a god-self, that we keep well hidden behind a physical/emotional shell that we show to ourselves and to the world. In dreams "marriage" normally refers to union with our essence/god-self, not a worldly union. Clothes and costumes refer to the shell that we've created to hide out true identity. Shoes refer to our "foundations", perhaps. or as Cayce said, our "understanding". (the imagery of flip-fops is wonderful in this context).
Dreams like this are totally positive. When you are being primed to get in touch with your true essence -you WILL have costume failures, so you can get glimpses behind the shell.
Hope this is of some value to you.
9 | Mike | June 12, 2005 03:23 PM
Better check all the snaps, buttons, pins, hooks and elastic. Mike's "costume failures" brings to mind Janet Jackson's "costume malfunction." :-)
10 | SantaDad | June 13, 2005 10:13 AM
Don't worry, before my wedding I had reoccuring nightmares of getting a spontaneous nosebleed at the altar and bleeding all over the front of my gorgeous white dress. Because of the dreams, when the big day finally came, my sister hid some kleenex in the little handbag that held her tossable rosepetals! And--I'm glad to say--there were no nosebleeds that day! All went swimmingly.
11 | Lisa | June 16, 2005 07:35 PM