Deb I just love it that I get to be first to enter something today! I am a newly wed too and I totally and with you on these sentiments! I have a few galpals getting married in the next year and they have all these lovely visions of tulle and sequins and flower petals and I just have to keep reminding them about how things will not WILL NOT be perfect but it will still be WONDERFUL. And that it all that matters. *hugs to all the bride-to-be.....it will all be OK*

You're so right - it's more work, but I would never go back. However, if there are no flowers on Valentine's Day...

I just got married on New Years Eve and for the past month my husband has become a cover hog! We lived together for over a year prior to the wedding, but why now am I playing tug-of-war with the sheets??? Glad to know this is a common issue and not just my own dysfunction!

Just wanted to comment from the other side of the fence. Me and man hubby have been married for 5 years and things not only didn't change, they've been so much better! He's as kind, considerate and compassionate as ever. I fall in love more every single day! And who needs flowers when you can have a big screen tv, or comfier couch!

oh thank GOD I'm not the only one!

I'm on the other side of the fence with Jessie. I can't say things really changed after we were married - I would say that things got, and continue to get, so much better. I'm 8 months pregnant, though, so I'll check in after the baby arrives. I'm pretty, um, sure that things will in fact change then.

Married such a short time and already an expert! But like I tried to warn you about not "going crazy" over the wedding ceremony, no one ever listens --everyone just has to go through the same experiences by themselves, including the inevitable blanket stealing.

But White Castle on Valentine's Day. How romantic! I used to go there all the time, but I thought they went out of business. I wonder how much one of those little hamburgers are now?

When I was a teenager, we used to drive to the WC on Boston Post Rd. and Fordham Road in the Bronx. A girl would put a tray on a bracket over the open window of the car and we'd order a few dozen of those little burgers. They were 6 cents each .. of course only a mouthful, but a bargain at any rate.

Soooo...whaddayado if the whining isn't working in a timely fashion NOW? (Granted, we aren't domesticated in the same home yet, but...) And flowers? I get gooshey over the big honkin EMAIL bouquet he sent a few years back, but I never get flowers just to get flowers...tho I did on our first date..roses...a dozen...and he was 45 minutes late. I think he was waiting for them to open "just so" :P I shouldn't bitch...he's a lovely guy...and he isn't intimitated that I am a dork at the same level he is, yet doesn't understand my innate NEED for sparkly things and blossoms that cost a fair bit and die three days later and a closet filled with shoes that see the light of day three times a year...

And for everyone else, perhaps this dates me...when the heck was White Castle a restauarnt? I thought the little things came in boxes in the freezer section ALWAYS... (remember please I live in Colorado where beautiful food is rare.)

I took my husband to a White Castle here in Ohio, since he's from Scotland and never had one. I hadn't had one in years myself. Man were we disappointed! I can't believe my family ever liked those. Sorry for the negativity, I just can't believe you like them!

Happy Valentines Day!

Learning to live with Brad is the hardest thing I've ever done - even more so than Business Calc - and that sucked hard.

But I love him and think marrying him is the best thing I've ever done in my life. Three months tomorrow.

happy to be a smitten reader... first day here and already feel at home. my wife and i have been happily married 6 months now. and, hell yes jessie/erin et al, every day is better than the last.

That is too funny. I posted something similar yesterday. I love my husband to death, but if we're going to communicat I guess I'm going to have to learn some sports terms and incorporate them into my everyday lingo. :)
Happy V-Day!

Thats was deliciuosly tongue in cheek....thanks for a smirk first thing on a Monday...gotta go comment on blizzard pics..J

i've been reading this blog for a while. i just moved in with my sweetie on saturday (yes, that's right, before the blizzard hit). its so strange, but we're getting married in august, so we better figure this out earlier as opposed to later. you have worried me with your talk of a thicker skin and a deafer ear... i'm sure it'll happen to us, but i'm not sure how happy it'll make me.

We already have cover hogging and snoring and lack of floral arrangements. However- for Christmas my future in-laws gave us a weekend in Quebec.(Nate's worked nights for two years and we barely get time to do anything together.) We've been together 3 1/2 years and I was whining wondering where the romance has gone. He bought me a rose from the restaurant even though I'm sure it was over-priced and he is very economical, and he still holds my hand when we cross the street- I let him feel like I need him to.

Hello All! I just wanted to comment on the 'marriage changes the man' topic of conversation.
I recently moved in with my fiance' after being engaged since December, give or take the few days we fought and he asked for the ring back (three times total...i believe). He is kind to me most of the time, and our bedroom life has been great...until about a week ago.
Perhaps he isn't feeling the love-vibe from me, since i in turn, am no longer feeling it from him.
Funny thing is... I am in no hurry to set a date, nor am i really very excited when i think of spending the rest of my life with this man. Still, i know if ever i ask him if we can take a step back and end the engagement, but still see each other, he will likely just break it off for good.
I love him, but it is I who have the problem with committment. I've just noticed alot more warning signs since living with him. I feel completely smothered; like the light at the end of my tunnel is shining very dim these days. Any advice is very welcome.

Cancelling weddings at the last minute is really expensive. That's the stupid main reason for many couples.

You know PenAzzz, I feel the same with my fiance. if i find an answer I'll post a comment. but don't hold your breath.

both of you can keep romance in your marriage, but it takes a little effort from each of you. I have been married for 16 yrs. but together for 31. Things change, the honeymoon stage comes and goes. There are times when all he has to do is look at me like he did the day he married me and I melt. He forgets some things too. Women seem to be more in tune with the emotional side of our relationships and some men do too. But for the most part, I have discovered over all these years that men are simple creatures. To be happy, they just want respect in their home, a hot meal after a long day at work, some unwinding time and fun in any room in the house, with his wife initiating more often. Sorry girls, even tho' we want to be romanced like we were before the wedding, they want us to provide the "lap dance" entertainment to spark their interest & get their "motor running". He likes to be chased too. It's not that complicated, trust me.
Signed: Happily Honeymooning in Florida